CHOICES LEAD TO NEUROSIS…
Being a modern woman today is fraught with anxiety and life envy – bold statement eh? Let me explain….
As women living in the western world the lives we are living are nothing like the women that have gone before us – I defy anyone to find serious synergy between their life and their mothers or grandmothers? We are living in brand new era, for the first time ever we have financial, political, marital and workplace freedom. We can control our reproductive cycle, our bank accounts and our living environment. We are told over and over again we can have it all but in my experience this comes at a cost. The cost is waking up at 3am in a cold sweat worried about whether you made the right decision about work, kids, mother in law, husband, boss, dinner choice, shoe selection, previous conversation with a friend blah blah blah.
This is the neurosis of too much choice! The same conversations are going on in every coffee shop all over the UK as women discuss and stress over all these choices and then the envy and guilt starts, has she got it right and I am on wrong path? Should I be spending more time with my kids? Is working over indulgent? Am I flawed because I am childless? Have I let myself go? Should I spend more time on personal grooming etc etc. I read an article in O Magazine some time ago suggesting there are only 4 types of women today…
1. Those who choose work over family and are in conflict about it
2. Those who choose family over work and are in conflict about it
3. Those who choose family and work and are in conflict about it
4. And mystics – those who have the ability to drown out the constant noise, have found some inner peace and life purpose, recognise their path and follow it with ease.
This really resonated with me. In times past every village had a few mystics, but today to make sense of the noise and the choices it would seem to me we all need to be one!
I think we need to be kinder to ourselves and other women as we are all managing the same barrage of choices on a daily basis, we question everything, all the time and we allow our inner dialogue to constantly tease us and undermine us regardless of the choices we make.
This myth of having it all creates formidable Superwomen, a subject I dedicated my first book to Superwoman Her Sell By Date Has Expired – Time To Show Little Miss Perfect The Door!
I have also coached hundreds of women to see their world in a different way.
We must remember we are pioneers, going where women have never gone before. Let’s celebrate this and know with certainty, that the choices we are making are part of the bigger plan for global female empowerment and are the right ones for us, now.
I currently have some coaching slots available for 2016. Get in touch if it is your time to step up and shine!