I was left speechless last week after reading about the Brazilian student who sold her virginity via an online auction for £482k to a Japanese business man. My husband said ‘Jane you gotta blog about that’ but what is there to say? What kind of society have we created that accepts this? And what is left once you have sold your most precious gift like a handbag or a second hand car?
I have now had time to reflect and I am ready to comment and talk about porn, yes porn. Believe me when I say, I was no angel in my teen years, however today the multi billion dollar porn industry is out of control, with too much power and way too much exposure, quite literally! It is no longer the domain of the top shelf, slightly seedy, and the hidden occupation of old, sad men it is out in the open available for free to anyone and everyone including our children. We have mainstreamed it and in my opinion, as a society, we are now paying the price.
Girls thinking it is trendy to look and behave like porn stars, boys seeing control, manipulation and exploitation as the way to woo a girl and looking bemused and confused in the process? They are both learning how to behave and getting their sex education from porn scenarios and before you tell me that porn is empowering and allows girls to pay their way through University. 90% of ALL porn scenes contain acts of verbal and/or physical abuse towards women. Raising our children on this stuff is like a ticking bomb! Is it any surprise that the incidents of domestic violence in teenage relationships are on the up? Cosmetic surgery is seen as normal with many girls beleiving a boob job is inevitable, striving to look like a pouting, big haired Barbie, the increase in STDs, teen pregnancies normalised. Where does it stop? When do we take action?
What happened to self respect? Girls are now as promiscuous as boys, often predatory, the notion of safe sex is simply that, A NOTION – do you see porn stars stopping mid flow to rip open a condom?
Not only have we mainstreamed porn we continue to glamourize it by accepting its by products without question – pole dancing as a form of exercise? Pouting lips, waxing, 8 inch stilettos, Lap dancing clubs as an ideal location for hen parties etc? We are courting trouble here and if we accept this how can we expect our children to see the harm or exploitation waiting around the corner?
Boys as young as 11 are addicted to internet porn before they possess the basic emotional intelligence to understand that it is NOT real life. This leads to warped expectations of sex and relationships – not the stuff of boy meets girl or a loving partnership is it?
Porn is neither female friendly nor the way for our teenagers to learn about sex. If we don’t start teaching them a new dance we can expect more of the same and don’t even get me started on Rainbow parties! Google it, but you have been warned, not for the feint hearted.
Breath Jane, breath!